Its probably our fault, bringing them into our world and asking them to protect our pots of herbs and flowers. They aren't meant to live in such close proximity to humans as ours have.
The first three that died were brothers, Bodley, Dink, and Finkle. Bodley was in charge of protecting our mailbox when we lived in Newnan, Ga. He was taken from us, stolen by humans while at his post - we never heard from him again.
Dink guarded the maple tree and bird bath. He was attacked by fire ants and eaten from the inside out until he crumbled to pieces.
Finkle survived the move from our first home to where we live now, but due to an "outdoor furniture tragedy" he was broken in half.
The fourth was named Gerome. Gerome the gnome was my wife's gnome before we were married, so he was used to the mountain that we now live on. He traveled from my wife's home to our first home together in Newnan to where we live now. He surveyed our entire house from a little hidden spot on our deck. Only his eyes and red hat were ever fully visible. He looked after our little pots of herbs and made sure all the little chick-a-dees and bluebirds stayed fed.
I don't know if you are aware of this, but the only known enemies to gnomes are trolls. Trolls are smelly and evil and you don't want them living around your house. Gerome had been battling trolls around our house for a while and successfully kept them at bay. That is, until we left our house to go deliver our daughter 5 weeks ago.
We were gone for a week and Gerome the gnome was left to defend our cabin all by himself. He stayed by his post and put up a good fight. But when we returned to our little cabin in the woods and went out to introduce Gerome to our daughter, this is all we saw:
A troll tore off his head. His little red cap stayed intact on his poor little body-less, bearded head. His body, cold, as his little fingers still grip his garden hoe. He died a noble death protecting our herbs and little mountain birds from trolls - but he was only one gnome.
Good-bye, Gerome.
3 comments:
Fear Not! For it is a fact that where there is one gnome, several gnomes stay nearby, to support one of their own. The visible one that takes on the job of guarding that which is important to them in the "Big World". These Ninja Gnomes will continue the gnome vigilance of protecting all that is good. And one day...one day...another gnome will be selected to take Geromes place. A place of honor.
trolls are stinky
I really feel for Gerome, but I can't get the mental picture of Jamie Lee Curtis wearing her underclothes in "Trading Places" out of my brain. Male hormones? For real? Genetically male? She was voted "Hollywood's Best Body" for practically a decade! Sorry, no way.
OK, back to poor but noble Gerome... Trolls are stupid, primitive, distrustful and unbelievably ugly creatures. They turn to stone when exposed to sunlight. Because they are so dumb, perhaps we could work with the Ninja Gnomes to trick those nasty devils.
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